must

by hush muhney

/
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credits

released February 13, 2016

tags

license

all rights reserved
Track Name: belyrelydroow
release me like a horse from a gate
like a wolf from a cage
like i oughta

cut the shit
i am no child now

i swallowed my gum so i could kiss you
i swallowed your cum
i don't know if i miss you

bailey riley drew

when i stand
thinking of not falling
i am
meditating
Track Name: dadd i
what does your daddy do?
i mean besides pay your rent
does he sleep on the couch?
daddy's mad cause he's only good for money
Track Name: quick (2014 demo)
oh restless sleep
when will we meet again
you look this way like r.e.m.
i have only been seeing you
in my dreams
Track Name: do ti
when i think of you i still think about angels
i think of falling.
(because of the modern age and my tenderness)
your face pops up unexpected
and i’m unguarded
and awash with fondness
struck.
wings falter, heavy-bodied collapse
from the sky, crumpled
you skid and fold over, and roll,
flung,
out of my reach
how it should be.
how it should be


it is not sad for lessons to be over
it feels sad
it never quite feels over


it’s interesting to think of the self as building
layer upon layer over time,
so if you peeled back,
you could find the child.
the needle-point-existence-speck of time.
that would make you boarded up,
blanketed up,
insulated within me.
getting relatively closer to my core as i grow.
yes, that’s about right:
what you did best was always inspire romantic fancies.
what you always did best was flourish my pen.
i barely remember any real details anymore. i wouldn’t ask if you do.

my tongue palate has changed
you are old favorite taste
get out of my face

there is no more puppy boy
that’s a dead dog
Track Name: need-to-know basis
(i need to know everything)

take me out like the garbage
i know you're the hardest
running thru the streets and tagging my neck

growing pains
remember when all you wanted to do was skate?

high school was full of shit and
that much pot is a symptom of sadness

i'm so tired i could cry
but i'm so happy i could die
i'm fine
Track Name: write a poem driving/crash
it's impossible not to worry
what drives you forward when you're content?
what's left?

i uh oh love(d) the sadness
can't take me away from me

what parts of yourself will grow back
when you cut them away?
a healthy dose of pain

it's difficult to be elastic

i can feel my heartbeat in different parts of my body
my heart is running away from me

writing a poem driving my car
and i crash my car
Track Name: exotic bird in the suburbs
they say
wretchedness is a quality of youth
most worthwhile people outgrow
and you know
i am like an exotic bird in the suburbs

i have a predisposition to addiction and a
penchant for falling in love with the same
got an appetite for macro apoptosis
now a duty to keep my wrists clean

above all
i wanna pour myself into you
just to be pissed back into the world

i don't know if i believe in zen
but i do believe in bliss
and i just wanna be a beautiful observer
and to be praised and loved for it
Track Name: cердце в рот
WARNING this was written in high school


you wouldn’t care if i stayed
i’ve been up for days
trying to get places
i am
very very dizzy
i am to be
tossed about with
my heart in my mouth
i will use my broken bones as paddles
as the waves slap across my face
and i choke on foam, your breath
disease-contracting caress

(be careful seducing a poet) (oh you’ll regret it)

you are just another i will forget
but right now i can’t remember that

cutie baby with a hard-knock past
i’ll write songs about love we have not had

pocket knives and rough hands
that usher in butterflies
i forgot i could have
tracking the growth of my eyelashes
and the healing of your given scratches

i can’t remember that
i can’t remember that